Sunday, October 24, 2010

The Cool Color of 9,300 Degrees, Kelvin

Nine thousand, three hundred also happens to be the number of words Julia (Jules) Archer wrote during the Word Count Contest to take the win:


Actually, 9,371. Nine thousand words she wouldn't have had without the contest - I expect a shout-out in the preface, when it is published!

Congratulations to Julia and all the Honorable Mentions: Dustin Hodge, Jenny Preston, Chris Andrews, Rochelle Gregory, and Jo Prescott.

I'm honored to report that I've been given permission to read everyone's work, and I look forward to doing so.

Thank you all for participating! My friend still isn't "finished" with the first draft of his novel, but now he can switch to edit mode, and expects to knock that out in the next couple of days.

Respectfully, I am
B. Freret

Saturday, October 23, 2010


Place your pencils on your desks, and step away from the Scantrons - show me your hands! Better.

Boudreau's Birthday Bash Word Count Writing Contest is officially over.

If you have not complied with this rule:

You must email a single Word document containing all the words you've written, to me, before 12:00am EST 10/24/10. I will use Word to determine the total number of words in your document. I will then destroy the document, and the email, and if you'd like, my computer as well, unless you tell me in the body of the email that I may read the document, in which case I will likely read a page or two or the whole thing, weeping and gnashing my teeth (rending of clothing discretionary) at the beauty of your work, before destroying the document, and the email, and my computer.

Then you are wrong.

Results tomorrow!

Your Humble and Obedient Servant,
B. Freret

Friday, October 22, 2010

Final Day of Competition!

All good things must come to an end, and so does Boudreau's Birthday Bash Word Count Writing Contest. The final day is nigh (work that one into a sentence today, I dare you): competition ends at 11:59pm EST, Saturday. So send me your Word-compatible documents at or before midnight, Saturday, so I can identify and post the winner, and sing and perform a song in her/his honor. Oh, and get an address to ship the book(s).

So far as I can tell, everyone who is actually writing has, like, 8,000 words-ish so far, give or take. So the contest is still anybody's to win. Is that grammatically correct? Do I care?

Respectfully, I remain
B. Freret

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Week One Standings - UPDATED

Okay, as of late Saturday, the end of week one, here are the standings as reported to me (and, in the case of the last three listed, as I suspect until told otherwise):

Chris: 6,144
Julia: 5,508
Jenny: 3,500
Jo: 700
Dustin: Some number

Donna: No number
Rochelle: No number
Milton: No number

Remember, my friend is giving the prize to one of you - he isn't going to give it to himself*, even if he has the most words when the contest ends.

So, write. Then write some more. This is going to be close, and the prize is totally worth pushing yourself.

Respectfully, I am
B. Freret

* A touchy subject best left alone.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Winding Up Week One

As the first week of Boudreau's Birthday Bash Word Count Writing Contest winds down, this seems like a great opportunity to beg everyone to please send me their total word counts so far.

Please send me your total words so far? Please? In a comment to this post, perhaps? Whatever it takes.

I'll post them here in a blog entry, so we can all see who is in the lead for first place and Todd Heldt's wonderful novel, Before You Were a Prophet. My friend, the contest organizer, has no small amount of anxiety that no one can see where everyone stands. There will be a winner, and at least one book (two, if the previous record is broken) will be mailed to one of you.

So, would everyone please provide me with their total number of words so far, so I can post the standings as of the close of week one?

Your Humble and obed't Serv't,
B. Freret

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Boudreau's Birthday Bash Word Count Writing Contest Web Badge

We have one, courtesy of Art Director Ben:

"Boudreau's Pipe of Rhetorical Grandiosity"

Competitors can now spread the word about their participation on blogs, websites, and Facebook pages!

You can follow Ben on twitter @bentoons
Thanks, Ben!

Respectfully, I remain,
B. Freret

Monday, October 11, 2010

During Day Two

Jules is getting it done, with 3,542 words down on day one. Yes, that is a one day total. She wants to be like my friend when she grows up, a machine, and that is the way to do it. Now just do that every day, and you'll be untouchable! Really. No one will want near you. Shower somewhere in there, won't you? With soap.

Jenny's first day total of 2,165 words, if I remember correctly, has broken her total word count from last year for the entire two weeks, so kudos to her on this milestone. You'll note at her blog that she's shooting for 42K, no doubt to beat my remarkably good looking (and modest) friend's total from last year of 41 and change.

(Nicely posted to your blogs, you two. You both get cookies for following directions. Ahem.)

Jo has released, via Facebook, that she has 700-ish words thus far. But we all understand that poets are different- they have this thing about choosing the right words. And she is Canadian, so depending on the exchange rate, that is something like 900 words, American.

Everyone else? I don't know. Stay tuned.

About the author of the prize book(s), did I mention that Todd is a Pushcart nominee?

Humbly, I am
B. Freret

Sunday, October 10, 2010


Boudreau's Birthday Bash Word Count Writing Contest is on!

To recap the rules:
  • You may contribute to an existing project for the contest, but only the words you write during the contest period will count for the contest. If you finish a project, you may begin a second project.
  • The contest HAS COMMENCED, effective 12:01am EST 10/10/10, and will conclude at 11:59pm EST on 10/23/10.
  • You must post a running total word count daily at your blog / web site, so the other competitors can see where everyone stands.
  • You must email a single Word document containing all the words you've written, to me, before 12:00am EST 10/24/10. I will use Word to determine the total number of words in your document. I will then destroy the document, and the email, and if you'd like, my computer as well, unless you tell me in the body of the email that I may read the document, in which case I will likely read a page or two or the whole thing, weeping and gnashing my teeth (rending of clothing discretionary) at the beauty of your work, before destroying the document, and the email, and my computer.
  • You must wish me a happy birthday. It is today.
In addition to my friend, the lineup includes:

  • Jules
  • Rochelle
  • Donna
  • Milton
  • Chris
  • Emily
  • Jenny
  • Dustin (like Milton, no website, so we have to work something out to publish their daily totals in a way that everyone can easily access), and
  • Jo
I am honored and humbled to be associated with these people, and I know that great things will happen as a result of this process.

B. Freret

Friday, October 08, 2010

One More Day to Join

You have one more day to commit to Boudreau's Birthday Bash Word Count Writing Contest. It is a fact that people who train for anything (alcoholism and morbid obesity, even), accomplish more in groups. (This is a fact that I am not going to bother looking up.) It is also a fact that we are an amazingly resilient species (humans), and can push ourselves to do fantastic things for two weeks, without breaking anything or suffering any permanent (negative) consequences.

So here is the call: do yourself the favor of finding out what you can do. Push yourself harder than you would have otherwise, and see what happens. Don't think, just write. And for goodness sakes, don't edit, or diagram backstory, make character notebooks, create a fictional language, sketch characters, use the word "dystopian" (ever), or eat paste or chase butterflies or whatever the hell else people do to avoid writing.

Just write.

A lot.

As Charles De Mar said in Better Off Dead (1985), "Go that way, really fast. If something gets in your way, turn."

To the academics who have signed up, I have nothing to say for you: textbooks and dissertations and conference papers (oh my)? Yeah, I got nothing- chances are (?) you wouldn't be doing a lot of backstory, character notebooks, fictional languages, or sketches anyway. I think. So hey, eat paste, if that is what you do. Hit the Elmer's Buffet, if that gets you where you'd like to be in two weeks.

When my friend the writer did this last year, he was changed forever. For the better. So this is really all about sharing the love. The love, and finishing the first draft of his novel.

New Additions:
  • Dustin (like Milton, no website, so we'll work something out on publishing their daily totals), and
  • Jo
I'll post a final list of entrants, when the list is final.

Respectfully, I remain,
B. Freret

Monday, October 04, 2010

New Contestants; Trash Talk

The competitor list for Boudreau's Birthday Word Count Challenge was looking lopsidedly academic: more professors with smartypants projects were signing on than fiction writers. That seems to be balancing out some with the addition of

and the trash talk has commenced, but you'll have to friend me on Facebook (if you haven't already) to witness that. Go check it out, I'll wait. It is between academics, which is really adorable. They're so cute when they try to talk smack!**

Of course, an academic cannot win the contest - they're unduly burdened with things like quality over quantity, and for this challenge, quantity is queen.

Speaking of quality, I previously gave incorrect links for two competitors: here are the correct links to their blogs:

Humbly, I am
B. Freret

* Technically, Anna said "no."
** If Van Winkle signs up, and he won't, this will have to be revised. He can persuasively throw down the smack talk.

Word Count Contest Update

So far, the following superstars have stepped up to the plate, forks in hand, because I wasn't talking about that kind of plate:

Yes, I know - one of these things is not like the others.

There is room for more. Please see the rules, below, and go for it. What have you got to lose?

Your Humble and obed't Serv't,
B. Freret

Sunday, October 03, 2010

Boudreau's Birthday Bash Word Count Writing Contest

The title is a bit misleading, I'm afraid, because it isn't really my writing contest, but a friend of mine (who, unlike me, is a writer) has asked me to do this for him. Apparently he doesn't own or use a computer, and I am nothing if not accommodating. (It is, however, my birthday. Hence the title.)

So, here is the deal.

This is a word count contest: (s)he who writes the most words during the duration of the contest toward one single project shall be the winner. There will be a prize.

There are rules:

  • If, like my friend, you are nearing completion of a manuscript, you may work on it for the contest, but only the words you write during the contest period will count for the contest. If you finish, as my friend intends to, you may begin a second project.
  • The contest will commence at 12:01am EST 10/10/10, and conclude at 11:59pm EST on 10/23/10. My abacus suggests this is very nearly two weeks.
  • You must email me at no later than 10/9/10 if you wish to participate.
  • You must post a running total word count daily at your blog / web site, so the other competitors can see where everyone stands.
  • You must email a single Word document containing all the words you've written, to me, before 12:00am EST 10/24/10. I will use Word to determine the total number of words in your document. I will then destroy the document, and the email, and if you'd like, my computer as well, unless you tell me in the body of the email that I may read the document, in which case I will likely read a page or two or the whole thing, weeping and gnashing my teeth (rending of clothing discretionary) at the beauty of your work, before destroying the document, and the email, and my computer.
  • There will be a prize. My friend who made up this contest is ineligible for the prize, which works out well for you, because he is an inhuman machine when it comes to generating gratuitous verbosity.
  • You must wish me a happy birthday. It is 10/10/10.

The prize is a new copy of Todd Heldt's novel, Before You Were a Prophet. (Todd Heldt is eligible for the contest, but not the prize.) I own a copy. I have read it. I think you should, too. (I am not sending you my copy, I will not part with it, so stop asking.)

In the stupendously unlikely event that the winner beats my friend's two week record of 41,301 words, then a bonus prize will be given in addition to Before You Were a Prophet. The bonus prize is Todd Heldt's recent collection of poems, Card Tricks for the Starving. I own a copy. I have read it. I think you should, too. (I am not parting with my copy, but let's be realistic, nobody is going to write more than 41,301 words, anyway, so I'm probably not going to have to buy a second copy to give to you.)

Right now, these are not signed copies, but if the winner would like, I will forge Todd's signature, along with a nice note about that time you shared together in Milan, inside the book(s).

If you have any questions, please email me. I will post the participants with links to their sites, and will post regular progress reports and questions / answers, here.

Humbly, I remain,
B. Freret

Me, reading my copy.

Friday, October 01, 2010

He Said "Dongle"

This was just forwarded to me by a like-minded acquaintance. By reproducing it here, I am not condoning my acquaintance's use of the word "dongle" in a business letter.

Jeff Radke
Vice President of Sales
Sweetwater Music

Mr. Radke, my experience with Sweetwater Sales Engineer Eddie Tighe was extraordinary.

I dropped out of music from about 1990 - 2002, and a lot changed in gear sales during that time. You know, like the internet.

Since starting back in 2002, I've bought (and sold) a lot of gear (for a hobbyist, anyway), and have never had an experience like this one with Eddie. It was closer to what it used to feel like in the 80s, dealing with my local mom and pop shop. Except they were insufferable assholes. So really, it was more like what a mom and pop experience should have been.

I signed up for the Peavey Ampkit Link 'keep me updated on when this comes out' list at My contact information must have been forwarded to Sweetwater, because Eddie contacted me shortly thereafter. He quickly answered some questions as best he could on what amps were included in the free and paid versions of the Ampkit app, and got back to me when he had more information. Every couple of weeks checked in with me, always friendly, never annoying or pushy. I really felt like he knew what he was doing, cared about my interest in this one $30 item, and was enjoying his job.

Sadly, how often is any of that the case, in any field?

I've known for a while that what I just experienced is Sweetwater's 'hook' - but I never thought it could be helpful to me. I mean, if you need to order a $10 Chinese cable, how good do you need to feel about that? Or even in this case, a $30 dongle? (I've always wanted to be able to say 'dongle' in correspondence.) But you know what? I'm thrilled with the purchase experience. Who couldn't use a little more kind, intelligent human interaction in their day?

I got what I wanted, at a great price, and felt good about the purchase. The purchase. Not just the item or the price, but the process of buying it, too. (I can tell you the last time I got warm fuzzies walking out of Guitar Center: NEVER.) So in my experience, Sweetwater is a win all around. Because of Eddie Tighe.

Thank you,
Name Withheld*


Though not a musician, I, too, have had similar dealings with Guitar Center - I once received a curious advert from them that baffles me to this day. I wrote about it here.

Well, with warm fuzzies in hand**, I remain

B. Freret

* Not his real name.
** I hope this is not a crude expression.

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Waiting for Pizza

I ordered carry out pizza, paid, and sat on a bench near the counter to wait. Others were ahead of me.

One, a man about my age (but who had unsuccessfully tried to hide his gray hair with what looked like mahogany wood stain) was trying to engage a group of three fit young men.

I listened as the man slurred his words in lopsided conversation with the three boys. He was too loud, though not yet obnoxious, and the young men were as softspoken and polite as they were ridiculously fit. So softspoken, in fact, that if I hadn’t been watching, I would have thought the comfortably numb gentleman was talking to someone on the phone.

“Football, yeah? All three of you? Where? Is that a college around here? Oh, high school?! Really? Hey, I played football for Duke!”

At that, I laughed a little too loudly.

This caught his attention. He turned to me with raised brow, eyes widened, and the corners of his mouth turned slightly downward. He looked more hurt than offended, and I briefly wondered if his lip was going to quiver.

“What? What is it?” he asked softly.

I could not control the smile on my lips any more than I could halt what passed through them.

“Oh, nothing, really. It’s just that when I’ve been drinking, I tell people that I played for Duke, too.”

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Heavier Things

The past few months I’ve neglected to thank several very talented, very kind people who have been generous with their skills and attention, so this unusual post is going to catch up on several thank yous that I owe:

First, this portrait of me is an original work by the amazingly talented Bentoons. Thank you, Ben! Ben plays bass in Pain of Evolution. He will kick your ass at chess. I’m not 100% on this, but I think that the time he spent drawing this portrait satisfied the last of his community service hours, so I think he gets the anklet removed and is safe to be around again. According to the court. Maybe.

Second, thank you Keelia Paulsen for designing the breathtaking All Hail Boudreau T-Shirt, and thank you Emily Cleigh for coordinating an utterly undeserved photo shoot of beautiful people wearing them. Notwithstanding my friend John’s reaction that “man, there must not be anything to do in Des Moines,” you know there is, and that these people all had better ways to spend their time.

Third, please extend your sympathy to both Anne Riley and Anna Lefler, who each ran out of things to write about on their own blogs, so they interviewed me. Between the two, every detail about my entire life has now been revealed, but if, for whatever reason, you want to interview me, I am available. If your first name is no more than four letters long, and the first three are “A-n-n.”

Fourth, my thanks to Dr. Donna Souder and Dr. Katherine Frank of Colorado State University, Pueblo: to Dr. Souder for inviting me to meet and spend time with the amazing* CSU-P faculty and students, and Dr. Frank for allowing me to stay once she found out. (And props for not following through on that call to the P.P.D. – whew, we’ll all look back on that one day and laugh, won’t we? Won’t we? I owe you one, Dr. Frank!)

Finally, thanks to Emily Cleigh again, for sharing her experience with something I wrote at Fictionaut.

Consistent with the somber, appreciative mood of this post, I leave you with this audio – me doing “Dirty” Harry Callahan at the Improv. On helium.

Humbly, I remain,

B. Freret

* Nobody left the room through the whole thing- can you believe it?

Friday, April 30, 2010

Selected Excerpts from an Early Draft of Chuck Palahniuk's "Fight Club"

A neighbor was kind enough to share notes from an early draft of Mr. Palahniuk's first novel Fight Club with me: I haven't read the published novel, but I have been meaning to watch the video. Maybe one afternoon next week, when I'm substitute teaching at my son's Kindergarten, I'll rent it and watch it with the kids.

For now, though, I'm passing these on - Mr. Palahniuk's style, at least in this draft, seems an eclectic mixture of high society, fashion, nerd culture, and humanitarian thoughtfulness. Amazing!

"Bob had rich fits."

"You have to consider the possibility that Karl does not like you... This is not the worst thing that can happen."

"On a long enough time line, the survival rate for everyone drops to, oh, say, 0.5 or so."

"The things you own end up owning you. Until Jay Leno wants them back."

"The first rule of Fight Heels is: you don't talk about Fight Heels."

"I'm so close to the end, and all I want is to play chess for the last time. I have Star Trek, and timers, and snacks..."

"3rd RULE: If someone says 'stop' or their cell phone rings, the fight is over. Unless they don't wanna take the call."

"Sticking feathers up your nose does not make you a chicken."

"6th rule of fight club: no shirts, no shoes, no service."

"Tyler was now involved in a class action lawsuit against the Pressman Hotel over the MSG content of their soup."

"7th RULE: Fights will go on as long as they have to. Or until Leno wants back in."

"Her name is Keelia Paulsen. Her name is Keelia Paulsen. Her name is Keelia Paulsen."

"8th RULE: If this is your first night at FIGHT CLUB, you HAVE to fight. Unless you've had a mani/pedi in the last 24."

"Like a donkey, ready to be shot into space. Space donkey! Ready to sacrifice himself for the greater good."

"You said that if anyone ever interferes with Project Golf Swing, even you, we gotta get his balls."

Monday, March 01, 2010

The "Creative Writer" Blogger Award

I've been tagged with (another) chain blog post award-doohickey-thingy! You know I'm all about following the rules, so here goes the "doing what I am supposed to" part:

1. Thank the person who gave this to you. (Thank you, John Ridge – I enjoy being tagged with these things a lot more than I probably should, and I'm flattered that you thought of me!)

2. Copy the logo and place it on your blog.

3. Link to the person who nominated you. (You should visit it, too – I love how John thinks and writes.)

4. Tell up to six outrageous lies about yourself, and at least one outrageous truth - or - switch it around and tell six outrageous truths and one outrageous lie.

5. Nominate seven "Creative Writers" who might have fun coming up with outrageous lies, or who have outrageous truths to share.

6. Post links to the seven blogs you nominate.

7. Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know you nominated them.

Now for the challenge - see if you can spot the true from the false:

1. I received my (first) Bachelor’s Degree when I was seventeen.

2. In 2000 or 2001, I walked past Kelly McGillis in an office hallway. Take My Breath Away was playing through the building's sound system. As we passed, Ms. McGillis sighed to her companion, "Am I ever going to get away from that song?"

3. My portrait, generously provided by bentoons, is a spot-on likeness, age progressed by (at least) twenty years. (Having this will be handy if I ever go missing: the authorities can simply put this picture on milk cartons and maybe someone will find me.)

4. I have a fan club in Des Moines, Iowa, composed of people more brilliant, talented, and hip than I'll ever be. I am grateful for these people and their fandom, and especially appreciate their questionable taste in writers.

5. I've seen Dokken perform. Twice. With Lynch. Maybe more, I can't say for sure because I don't remember.

6. Also in 2000 or 2001, I was on a very small plane with Leonardo DiCaprio. He was very kind to a young fan (not me) who was also on the flight, and I've admired him ever since. (DiCaprio, I mean.)

7. I think "Kentucky Fried Movie" and “Roadhouse” are two of the best films ever made.

And here are the poor friends I'm passing this challenge on to, in no particular order:

1. Anna Lefler

2. Carolyn Thériault

3. Donna Souder

4. Emily Cleigh

5. Anne Riley

6. Ali Eickholt

7. Jenny Preston

Thanks again, John!

Humbly, I remain,
B. Freret

Friday, February 12, 2010

See, I Think I am a Funny: Ligitimately!

"Well, I'm not a critic, I'm just a worker.
So, I'm always grateful for anything the critics say - good or bad.
- Mandy Patinkin

I am somebody! I have progressed beyond inspiring indifference, and have my first critic who cared enough to share the following at an online forum for the game Advanced Squad Leader:


Well, I checked out the interview. Not a thing he states, does he do so seriously. See, he thinks he is a funny. And I guess he is, a little bit. But not enough that he's actually published anything...

Then I checked out the guy's blog.

Seems he fancies himself a writer, and a humorist. Okay, some of his stuff is cute. Ho-hum.

It dawned on me today that his comment about Advanced Squad Leader was a commentary. He's making fun of us, basically. My theory is that he found a forum (perhaps this one), probably lurked, is fascinated by the whole internet forum dynamic, and soon learned about ASL's reputation, about the reputation of ASL's followers, followed some of the conversations, etc., etc. And in the interview, he's making fun.

The joke, as I'm sure he sees it, is that basically nobody who reads the interview will know what ASL is, and therefore it makes him seem just a little bit more quirky.

This is all just my opinion, but I utterly do not believe that anyone who studies the ASLRB and can talk intelligently about it, would not be able to play the game. To an ASLer, that statement is simply absurd. To the guy's two dozen fans, it would seem another example of the guy's quirkiness. He's JOKING, folks. I seriously doubt he understands ASL at all.

I'm not impressed, and frankly I don't expect to be hearing more about this guy in the future. His writing is not that good; if it was, he'd be published. I mean ligitimately published, not self-published or POD. I understand that getting published requires a great deal of luck, but really. He's not THAT good.

That's one of the problems with the internet: the dilution of talent. We are saturated with mediocrity or sub-mediocrity, and there is no motivation to edit or conduct proper research if all one does is "publish" on the internet. Eventually, humans will figure it out, and come to realize that just because something is on the internet does not mean it is any good or has even minimum standards. I figure it will take about a generation. My current batch of children, who are 8, 5, and 1, have grown up with the internet and have never known otherwise. Their generation will be the one to figure out that "internet" does not equal "authoritative".

Treadhead, Bloomfield Hills, MI

I am grateful and flattered, and appreciate the time and effort Mr. Treadhead put into this!

Your humble and obed’t Serv’t,
B. Freret

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Thursday, January 28, 2010

An Embarrassment of Riches

Dave Barry once said that writing is something journalists sometimes do when they aren't busy patting themselves on the back(s) and giving each other journalism awards. Or something to that effect.

So too, it seems, bloggers have taken to tagging one another Facebook-style with memes reminiscent of "25 Things About Me" and "Sexual Liasons I Had Intended on Keeping Secret But Then I Realized You'd Already Seen the Video," and I am honored to have been thrice tagged in the past week. Because if you know me, you know that there is nothing I enjoy so much as an opportunity to say "thrice" in a sentence. (Except, perhaps, "tertiary," which remains one of my favorite words, ever.)

First, Wendy (aka "Quillfeather") has bestowed upon me the Honest Scrap Award. Apparently, the Honest Scrap Award requires that I list ten things about myself, and then pass the award on to seven others. [Interesting to me is the fact that the ten things seem to carry no additional requirements: they don't have to be interesting, secret, or funny, and notwithstanding the name, I'm inferring that they don't even have to be factual. (Where was this sort of homework when I was in school?)]

The Honest Scrap Award does have a picture. I would tell you that it is a nice combination of a 1940's War Effort poster and a highway sign, but it would be easier (and more helpful) just to show you:

So, with that out of the way, here are my ten things:

  1. I am happy that this is the Honest Scrap Award, and not the Honests Crap Award.
  2. No, I do not really think that Honests Crap is grammatically correct.
  3. I could be mistaken about #2.
  4. Dave Barry once autographed a napkin for me, and called me his hero.
  5. Sometimes I think he was being facetious.
  6. Not always.
  7. I think some words are inherently funny. Burlap, for example.
  8. The statute of limitations has expired for every interesting thing I've ever done.
  9. I once used "Plato’s Form for bosoms" in a sentence.
  10. When discussing theoretical physics, I have, on more than one occasion, been accused of "rocking out with my Hawking out."
Next, the delightful Anne Riley gave me the Silver Lining Award, which I believe recognizes my ability to come up with five other blogs to pass it on to. I'm trying not to read too much into this award (does it infer that I suck, but there is a silver lining - like, for example, our puppy will still love me, no matter what?) and it, too, has a picture:

Finally, Christian Bell (who protests that he is not Emilio Estevez to the point of convincing that he is) has blessed me with the Circle of Friends Award, which, like the Silver Lining Award, requires that I pass it on to five others (and, to my relief, is in no way associated with fraternity members and a biscuit, like the punch line to a horrible joke that I cannot forget no matter how hard I try and will never be able to disassociate from the word "circle" in my scarred psyche).

Fear not, this one (the award, not the joke) also has a picture:

Due to the economy and global enviromental concerns, I am going to minimize the cost and the carbon footprint of this post by passing all three awards on to the following twelve worthy recipients:

  1. Anna Lefler
  2. Mylène Dressler
  3. Carolyn Thériault
  4. Katie McCullough
  5. Jason Everett Morris
  6. Harley May
  7. Ryoma Collia-Suzuki (and Gina, they're a package deal)
  8. Cynthia Reeser
  9. Diana Grey Wyatt
  10. Finnegan Flawnt
  11. Eisley Jacobs
  12. Amber Christensen

These blogs are all worth reading, as are the three who tagged me with these awards.

To continue the serious tone, I can think of no higher honor* than receiving peer recognition: in fact, Wendy, Anne, and Christian, it feels odd using the word "peer" because I look up to you and admire your work. So thank you for tagging me, it means more to me than I will admit in public.

Humbled, I remain
B. Freret

* This is not true. I think cash would be a higher honor.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Wonder Woman and the Lasso of Truth

A little something I cracked myself up with at Fictionaut:

Wonder Woman and the Lasso of Truth


B. Freret